“Can you pass the salt?” Smith asked as politely as possible.

“Sure.” 

This wasn’t even small talk. 

“Thank you.”

Microscopic talk.

“Welcome.”

Quantum talk: the smallest blocks of syllables that could build a conversation. 

He was telling Smith how jealous he was, with icy indifference.

Weeks of this, and for what? Succeeding? Everyone in their cohort had applied, not just her. The mentors repeatedly stressed the importance of applying: “Our program only exists because of companies like Rockreed/Harken. They’re the reason we can accept so many students.”

Quantum physics was a tough field. The religious protests, the push for government funding into the military, the dwindling student population; it took a toll on the department. Funding was scarce in a field where success was frequently hypothetical and all but impossible to measure. Those who were in the department knew its importance, but that didn’t translate to marketability. The secrets of the universe were cool, yet grants were hard to come by. 

Smith’s application was done the same day the post went up. She knew she could help people.

Smith had a concrete vision for her research, and needed a certain amount of start-up capital you just couldn’t expect in academia. 

Rockreed/Harken agreed; she got her official offer of employment less than a week later. 

She’d been frozen out by her colleagues just as quickly. Today was the last of it. This luncheon was the last time she would be with the entire cohort, and she started at R/H tomorrow. The traditional graduation ceremonies had become steadily less appealing as her colleagues had isolated her. 

I got hired by Rockreed/Harken. Nobody said this was going to be easy. The mantra kept her going.

*

Smith’s hands trembled while signing the last line of the contract. Twenty-seven pages of fine print, most of which she’d skimmed.

“Let me be the first to say it,” the HR representative said. “Welcome to Rockreed/Harken!”  Smith’s heart soared. 

Then she saw her office. 

Each door in the hallway had a sturdy bronze sign, with a section label and quote.

WEAPONS DEVELOPMENT

“A weapon isn’t good or bad, it depends on the person who uses it.” 

Jet Li

Smith looked at the guide, sure there was a mistake. 

“The atom bomb was no ‘great decision.’ It was merely another powerful weapon in the arsenal of righteousness.” 

President Harry S. Truman

The hallway stretched out before Smith in dizzying endlessness.

“The more you sweat in peace, the less you bleed in war.”

General Norman Schwarzkopf

Her guide kept walking. 

“Leaders must invoke an alchemy of great vision.” 

Henry Kissinger

She was supposed to be in renewable energy, her research had nothing to do with weaponry.  The thought of it disgusted her. 

“Is this…” Smith trailed off, but the guide continued walking forward without any hesitation. “Is this where I belong? I mean, this isn’t my department, is it?” 

“Of course. When we saw the drafts you provided, the immediate application jumped off the page.” 

The blood drained from her face. “I thought the offer – the job would be in the energy program?” 

“Yeah, we get a lot of flack if we’re too upfront about it. People want the safety of a strong defense, but get queasy about how we get there. Like the old saying, right, about hotdogs? Bombs are the same way.” 

He chuckled, as if bombs were just as much of a joke as hot dogs. As if a whole department dedicated to destruction was funny. As if death as a career choice was normal. 

“You’re going to be on Project Brooklyn.” He waited for her to get the joke. “Like first we had Project Manhattan… and Brooklyn is the new Manhattan?” She couldn’t laugh, preoccupied by the enormity of her mistake. He continued, “I guess you haven’t spent much time in New York.” 

*

Moses was told to hide from the face of God. It would have been too much for him to witness. Even for holy Moses the sight of the Almighty could not be risked. 

You can’t look at a nuclear blast. If you see the mushroom cloud, it’s too late. The pain is an instant away. That’s assuming you survive the blast to begin with: the acute radiation syndrome, the burns, the melting, the ongoing horrors. 

God did not show Moses the awesome power of the face. But we did. We used nuclear bombs to decimate a city. To kill tens of thousands of civilians. And then, days later, we did it again. Who are we to do what God deemed too dangerous?

*

A sleek computer displayed her research. Seven years of work – her hopes and dreams – displayed under the R/H logo. She shivered. Per the instructions, she opened the document labeled Background Memorandum and began to read. The devastation she felt upon seeing the bronze plaque was nothing compared to how she felt now. Her research would fit in. If anything had been in her stomach, she would have vomited. 

Smith was finally left alone to catch up on the status of Project Brooklyn. She couldn’t fully grasp the depth of it, but she had just enough of a view of the big picture to see how deadly the plan was. Out of habit, her mantra sprang to mind: I got hired by Rockreed/Harken. Nobody said this was going to be easy. 

*

Rockreed/Harken’s headquarters were surprisingly flammable. No one batted an eye when Smith stayed late. After all, she was catching up on decades of work. Nineteen hours into her first and last shift, she started the newest plank of her life plan. A safety search of the building, a quick check into office data-retention policies, a few well placed bundles of tinder, and a disconnect of a server. For all the technology in the world, fire was still more advanced. 

Smith turned away from the building, tears streaming down her face, unable to look directly at what she had accomplished.

***

C Goth is an artist, writer, and all-around sleepy guy. Goth works full time as a public defender, hence the pen name. On bluesky and instagram @g0thlawyer. Website: g0thlawyer.com